"When you least expect it..."

We all grow up awaiting to see how our future will turn out. Will we land our dream job? Make loads of mula? Will we marry our PERFECT man? hmmm...I'm going to tell you what I've been going through for some time now. A story of sorts. A personal story of mine. I am a relationship person. Always have been and even in my single days now, I can't deny that I'm not because deep down, like deep, deep down, I know I am. I've never really gotten the chance to be single. I've always had a boyfriend or been dating someone. Its not that I don't want to or that I can't but it has always worked out that way. Then, BAM!...I got dumped. I did the crying, depressed and sad bit for a while and then, I realized something. I'm okay. I'm alive, healthy and well. Given that I'm heartbroken but aside from that bit, I'm going to be just fine. After many trials and tribulations, I was finally content and happy with being alone and now, I embrace my time alone. I do everything for myself instead of always worrying about someone else (yes, I was that type of girlfriend). Now, don't think that I have all of a sudden turned into a anti-relationship person because that is not it at all. If the time was right for me to be in a healthy, committed relationship with someone whom I adore, I would be there! Trust me. But that's a story for another time.. Like I was saying, I basically taught myself how to appreciate the beauty in being alone and not to see it as a negative thing, as many people do. While doing all of this, you know being happy with Saturday nights in and all..I began to do what a girl always does too much of..THINK. What if there isn't someone out there for me? What if I end up solo? (I know you really want to shake me or better yet, slap me right about now...) But then I spoke to a woman whom I admire...she has it all. She has the wonderful career woman lifestyle, beautiful house and inside that house she has her wonderful husband and a beautiful little girl as well. She has the kind of personality that I can relate to. She and I had a chat one day and I definitely left a bit more inspired and feeling a little bit more secure with the future. See, I'm an over planning, over analyzing, over anxious individual and L.K. (we'll use her initials), set it all straight for me.

Now, we are all told, at one point or another in our lives by someone, "When you least expect it, it'll happen for you..." If I had a nickel for every time I heard this from someone when I told them about my love life dilemmas, I'd be rich. Okay, not rich but I'd be pretty darn wealthy. L.K. told me to embrace it. Embrace it all. I love the way she put it, "you have your whole life to be married. Embrace the twenty-something that you are and enjoy every moment that you have. Take the men that are asses to you, take the bad boys, the ridiculous relationships, the crazy nights with the girlfriends and the Saturday nights alone." Take them all as lessons to be learned.

I always heard people tell me that "it'll all work it out when the timing is right" and I wanted to punch them. I always felt like they felt bad for me and that's why they we're saying this to me. They were happy, why couldn't I be happy? But then, speaking to L.K. and actually taking in this time alone and reflecting, I figured out that its okay.

It's okay not to have a plan and finally just enjoy the moments you're given in your twenties. Love is for everyone. And you see, I never really took this in but love can be defined in so many different ways. Love can be with the person you most adore or love can be you alone, loving yourself. It took me a while but I've finally got it and guess what? I LOVE IT! This post is more mushy-gushy then usual but I've been fighting this for so long and to finally be able to come to terms with it makes me so happy. And I know that there are individuals like me out there and they too could use some encouragement just like I got some from L.K.

Going through something similar? Comments?

-Xo

Special Thank you to L.K.